Golden Mend
Welcome to Golden Mend – a modern, holistic approach to therapy
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Dear Margie - Blog

Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run.

Dear Margie

Addiction is not a choice. It originates in a human being’s desperate attempt to solve a problem. The problem of emotional pain, of overwhelming stress, of lost connection, of loss of control, of a deep discomfort with the self.
— Dr.Gabor Mate

You can send me any questions and I will do my best to answer them. I love to hear from you. Send your problems through to me - margie@goldenmend.com.au
No question is too little, too big or too silly.
Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run. It’s so important you feel heard and listened to, that you no longer feel like a victim of your past. Know that you are not alone and it is possible to be free of shame and guilt. You are worth it!

 

I’ve been diagnosed with depression: I feel so ashamed

Dear Margie

I’ve been diagnosed with depression. I feel so worthless, empty and ashamed. I’ve put on weight and I just feel tired and sad all the time. I can’t get out of bed in the morning and sometimes I wonder if life is even worth living.

ANSWER

I want you to know that I take signs of depression very seriously as I know that it can lead you to that black pit of despair. Depression is an illness of the nervous system with severe consequences at every level. Depression can feel like the slow death of our whole being. It’s really important to know this is an illness and it’s not your fault.

A depressed person may lose their ability to self-motivate and it often takes them between four to six years to seek treatment, if they ever do. During this time their relationships, work, appearance and health are often damaged.

I understand your life has broken, but you can rebuild it stronger than you ever believed. It doesn’t matter what happened, what truly matters is everything that will happen from now on.

Together, we’re going to pick up all those pieces and give them a shape again, without feeling ashamed of our past, without hiding our scars, because they show that we have been stronger. We will face this monster together.

If you give me the privilege of working with you, we will look at the depression loop of triggers, thoughts, feelings, symptoms, behaviour (usually avoidance) and the shame and stress associated. This is your personal illness and it deserves your own individual recovery plan. 

We will look at your unhealed trauma because depression is a form of trauma, we’ll look at perfectionism, shame, not good enough, grief and the latest neuroscience which includes gut health. You will learn about the silent killer – cellular inflammation, sleep hygiene and nutrition and so much more. 

We will find the root cause of your depression and tackle it together, with care and loving kindness. Our trapped emotions are the source of everything that ails us. We need to learn how to change negativity into positivity and find hope – one small step at a time.

The opposite of depression is vitality and we will work on a roadmap for your success which includes a purpose for your life and learning how to play again.

If you want to withdraw from anti-depressants, then with your consent, I will work with your prescribing practitioner on the withdrawal process. In short, I’ll be with you every step of the way.

If you are living with someone who may be depressed please offer your warm and non-judgemental understanding. It’s important not to add more pressure. Offer them your hand and help them climb out of the pit they are in.

margie Bauer