Golden Mend
Welcome to Golden Mend – a modern, holistic approach to therapy
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Dear Margie - Blog

Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run.

Dear Margie

Addiction is not a choice. It originates in a human being’s desperate attempt to solve a problem. The problem of emotional pain, of overwhelming stress, of lost connection, of loss of control, of a deep discomfort with the self.
— Dr.Gabor Mate

You can send me any questions and I will do my best to answer them. I love to hear from you. Send your problems through to me - margie@goldenmend.com.au
No question is too little, too big or too silly.
Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run. It’s so important you feel heard and listened to, that you no longer feel like a victim of your past. Know that you are not alone and it is possible to be free of shame and guilt. You are worth it!

 

Do I have to reach rock-bottom?

Dear Margie

Do I have to reach rock-bottom? I don’t want to lose everything I cherish.

ANSWER

You don’t need to wait until you hit rock bottom to gather momentum again, to start to fight for a new life. Change is not easy. And neither is accepting the possibility that we are responsible for the state we find ourselves in.
‘Hitting rock bottom’ has a different meaning for everyone. It’s a time when a person feels like things can’t get worse for them. Everything good about their life has been destroyed. Maybe your rock bottom came when you were in a car crash or picked up for drunk driving, or lost a relationship, or are behind in your rent.
Only a rock bottom can make you feel so uncomfortable that you want to find sobriety.
Many of humanity’s greatest advancements have been achieved by people who have hit rock bottom, people who could no longer cope, who in the midst of the deepest suffering had no other other choice but to stand up again, no other alternative but to pick up the pieces and rebuild their lives. 
You don’t need to focus on developing a bottom that looks like someone else’s bottom. You don’t need to sink to a specific deep, dark depth in your life in order to begin recovery.
You don’t need to wait until you hit rock bottom to activate all the resources available to you. Don’t wait until you reach the limit to find the energy required to rebuild your life.
You don’t need to lose everything.
You may have already seen signs that you need to make a change in your life, that you are suffering due to things that can be changed, that you could be living a different life. Don’t ignore these signs, don’t try to drown them out with noise, possessions or adventures.  
Stop and listen to what your body and your soul have to say, because some people, when they hit rock bottom, find themselves unable to rise up again.
No matter what your own rock bottom is, it’s never too late to reach out and ask for help.
I will be happy to walk alongside you as you discover the depths of your resilience, and as you begin to heal the cracks in your life and move into a life of meaning and purpose.

margie Bauer