Golden Mend
Welcome to Golden Mend – a modern, holistic approach to therapy

Dear Margie - Blog

Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run.

Dear Margie

Addiction is not a choice. It originates in a human being’s desperate attempt to solve a problem. The problem of emotional pain, of overwhelming stress, of lost connection, of loss of control, of a deep discomfort with the self.
— Dr.Gabor Mate

You can send me any questions and I will do my best to answer them. I love to hear from you. Send your problems through to me -
No question is too little, too big or too silly.
Besides helping to answer your questions, the Dear Margie blog will give you an idea of how our sessions may run. It’s so important you feel heard and listened to, that you no longer feel like a victim of your past. Know that you are not alone and it is possible to be free of shame and guilt. You are worth it!


Gambling is causing dramas in my house.

Dear Margie,

I don’t gamble every day but it’s beginning to cause big problems in my home life. I feel ashamed and full of fear to disclose this to anyone.


You don’t have to gamble every day to be a problem gambler. Gambling is a problem if it causes problems. These problems are not just financial. 

Too much time spent on gambling can also lead to relationship and legal problems, job loss, mental health problems including depression and anxiety, and even suicide.

It can happen to anyone from any walk of life. Your gambling goes from a fun, harmless diversion to an unhealthy obsession with serious consequences. Whether you bet on sports, poker machines, at the track or online – it can have serious consequences in all areas of life.  Gambling is an impulse-control disorder. If you’re preoccupied with gambling, spending more and more time and money on it, chasing losses, or gambling despite serious consequences in your life, you have a gambling problem. A gambling problem is often associated with other behaviour or mood disorders. Many problem gamblers also suffer with substance abuse issues, stress, depression, anxiety or bipolar disorder. To overcome your gambling problems, you’ll also need to address these and any other underlying causes as well.

The first step is to take a deep breath, pick up the phone and ring me. Or book a free 20 minute consultation. I promise to listen with no judgement, and with deep respect and understanding.

Gamblers Anonymous offers the following questions to anyone who may have a gambling problem. These questions are provided to help the individual decide if he or she is a compulsive gambler and wants to stop gambling.


1.        Has gambling ever made your home life unhappy?

2.        Did gambling affect your reputation?

3.        Have you ever felt remorse after gambling?

4.        Did you ever gamble to get money with which to pay debts or otherwise solve financial difficulties?

5.        Did gambling cause a decrease in your ambition or efficiency?

6.        After losing did you feel you must return as soon as possible and win back your losses?

7.        After a win did you have a strong urge to return and win more?

8.        Did you often gamble until your last dollar was gone?

9.        Did you ever borrow to finance your gambling?

10.  Have you ever sold anything to finance gambling?

11.  Were you reluctant to use “gambling money” for normal expenditures?

12.  Did gambling make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?

13.  Did you ever gamble longer than you had planned?

14.  Have you ever gambled to escape worry, trouble, boredom or loneliness?

15.  Have you ever committed, or considered committing, an illegal act to finance gambling?

16.  Did gambling cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?

17.  Do arguments, disappointments or frustrations create within you an urge to gamble?

18.  Did you ever have an urge to celebrate any good fortune by a few hours of gambling?

19.  Have you ever considered self-destruction or suicide as a result of your gambling?

Most compulsive gamblers will answer yes to at least 7 of these questions.

20. Did you ever lose time from work or school due to gambling?

margie Bauer